I was sad this morning.
I was bopping around the internet, stopping by some forums, throwing out virtual hugs, high-fives, and the occasional, “have you tried…” suggestions to desperate parents.
Too many times, I ran up against one of those comments.
The one that makes you cringe, because you know it sent a knife straight from the screen and into the tender-shoot of a struggling mom’s heart.
The one that said, dripping in haughtiness…
“I would never feed my baby THAT. It’s cancer in a bottle.”
“You’re being selfish working, you know. Your baby needs you at home”
“You’re trying to sleep train your 9-month-old? That’s abusive.”
“I think moms who [insert feeding choice here] are crazy.”
Quantum Mechanics In a Shape-Sorter
Each person reading this page (self included) has a million things going on right now, feeding into the larger context of this “parenting” thing we’re all trying so hard to ace.
Those “let me tell you why I’m better than you” kind of comments are so frustratingly pointless.
It’s taking something incredibly complicated (like Quantum Mechanics) and trying to squeeze it into a toddler toy.
True, the breastfeeding/formula, working mom/sahm, organic/who cares, categories seem like they should fit inside the standard “square, circle, triangle, star” holes of life.
But life is so much messier than what we’d like it to be.
Life is really more like a Jackson Pollock, when everyone wants to act like it’s paint-by-numbers.
The Year of the Phoenix
I’m hereby declaring this The Year of the Phoenix.
This is the year that moms who have felt the flash-burn of judgment turn that pain into a glorious beacon of encouragement for the moms coming after them.
We will use those not-so-good memories to fuel a new passion: building up a fresh generation of empowered and confident mothers.
No more Stepford Moms.
We’re all a mess, really.
Let’s be real with one another. This is why I decided to become a panelist in the Sisterhood of Motherhood program.
The video below will show you why I couldn’t resist hitching my wagon to the kindness campaign.
Not only will it make you chuckle, it has such a tenderly sweet message that I found myself looking around Starbucks for someone to hug. (You’ve been warned!)
Rising from the Ashes
Take a minute to consider the things people said to you in the past year regarding your “parenting job”. I’m sure many of them were encouraging, but there’s always that one…
It left you scowling. Defensive. Hurt.
Today’s the day, friend.
Bury those ashes. Remind yourself of the 101 ways you’re an awesome mom.
And then, deep inside let your heart stir…hatch…take flight. Let the pain of those judgmental and hurtful comments push you to do more for the new moms coming up behind you.
The ones with eyes as big as saucers who are so utterly overwhelmed with it all.
Take your wings and surround those newbies in acceptance, encouragement, kindness… It’s a beautiful thing, this Sisterhood of Mothers.
Let’s expand the flock.
Does your heart have healing to do?
How have others affected your mom-esteem? For good? or for evil?
Have You Read These Yet?
- 6 Productivity Secrets That Will Make Your To-Do List Obsolete
- 3 Lies About Motherhood and the Truth That Will Set You Free
- Toolkit for Moms on the Edge: 12 Homeopathic Remedies to Boost Your Mood
- Dear Homemaker: Use These 70 Life-Hacks to Steal More Time
Similac partnered with bloggers such as me for its Sisterhood of Motherhood Program. As part of this program, I receive compensation for my time. Similac believes that consumers and bloggers are free to form their own opinions and share them in their own words. Similac’s policies align with WOMMA Ethics Code, Federal Trade Commission (FTC) guidelines and social media engagement recommendations.
Heather is the Chief Encouragement Officer here at MightyMoms.club and has been writing and encouraging parents online since 2007. She’s a Certified Gentle Sleep Coach, has been a featured parenting expert writer on blogs like DaveRamsey.com, SimpleKids.net, Cafe Mom, and others. If it’s 2am and you’re desperate to read SOMETHING, check out her deepest darkest secrets, including why she really shouldn’t be allowed to blog.