Okay, show of hands:
Who else is sick and tired of vomit, screams, and poop?
Anyone? Anyone? (Bueller?)
I know that motherhood is supposed to be the Great High Calling of Femalehood and all that, but some days…
…some days I’m just not feeling it, ya know?
- Like the day that I wore a shirt with a Poonami stain all over town (because I was carrying Bella on my hip, of course) and NO ONE SAID A THING. I kept thinking to myself, “This town is really going down the crapper. Everywhere I go just stinks.”
- Or the day I shoplifted at
WalBalgreens because the thought of unbuckling all those kids and going back in to pay for a stupid bottle of shampoo that had accidentally slid under the diaper bag was past that day’s sanity quota. (Don’t worry, Mom. I did go back and made it right.)
- Or yesterday. When I called my hubby and told him that he was coming home for lunch, because if he didn’t there may one one less child greeting him at 5:10. (There may have been a little PMS going on there. Perhaps. A little. )
In honor of all those “Mom-No-More” days, I’ve written an open letter to my future self, and all the other moms out there who seriously consider following Alexander’s advice and moving to Australia. (Rumor has it, all you Happy Aussies don’t have days like these… 🙂 )
Here it goes…
Dear Exhausted Mom:
So today kinda sucked. You rose from your bed, ready to greet the world with a smile and OWN this mom thing.
You were ready to kiss boo-boos, soothe cries, comb out that rats nest (finally), and be the mega of all moms.
Now it’s the end of the day, and…
- You ran out of bandaids around lunch and had to start using stickers.
- The baby cries you were so determined to soothe would. not. stop. and you’re not sure why.
- An attempt was made to comb out the ball-o-hair attached to your daughter’s scalp, but it was quickly abandoned because (let’s be honest here) you’re not going anywhere anyway.
- A Category-5 todnado (toddler + tornado) swept through your bedroom, looking for his favorite potty training underwear, and expertly mixed up the clean laundry with the dirty. Now it’s either do the “Smell Test” or rewash. (FOR THE LOVE–HAVE MERCY–JUST REWASH.)
Now you’re staring at the wall without realizing it, wondering why in the world you were so excited to create these little minions in the first place.
These are the days that I like to call “Not Suitable for Hallmark.” Evidently no one wants to buy “Sorry I Screamed at You” greeting cards.
The days where the Greatest Achievement of the Day is that everyone’s still breathing at bedtime. For those days, let me offer a few gentle reminders…
Perfect Parents Do Exist…
It’s true, you know.
There is such a thing as a perfect parent.
- This parent never gets frustrated at their kids.
- This parent always knows exactly what to do.
- This parent regularly gets 8+ hours of glorious sleep every night.
They are a lot more common than you may think.
They are also EXTREMELY EASY to spot in a crowd.
They’re the ones who don’t have any kids.
Yes. You read that correctly.
Lots of advice.
Don’t let your mom-esteem lay in their hands, because *bending near and whispering* they will destroy you.
Let your spouse, yourself, your baby, and God determine your mom-esteem. (Btw, if you’re feeling a bit insecure about your mothering, check out my free ebook called 101 Ways to Be an Awesome Mom.
This Too Shall Pass
One of the biggest encouragements I ever received was this: “This isn’t forever.”
It’s true. You don’t have to “do all this” forever. You only have to do it through this particular season of life.
- You aren’t always going to be a 24-hour breastfeeding bar.
- You aren’t always going to have to be home by noon for naps.
- You aren’t always going to listen to those nightly witching-hour screams.
- You aren’t always going to be up 3 times a night (and if you are, that’s where we come in.)
Trust me, you won’t always feel like you have fuzzy green sweaters on your teeth. Regular showers and good hygiene is right around the corner. Promise.
Life will continue to plod along, and these consuming trials will be conquered and overcome. I think this quote says it best…
You’re Not Going Crazy
Last night I was carpooling with a few wonderful ladies on the way to a Beth Moore Bible Study. (The study is totally blowing me away, btw. It’s called Mercy Triumphs. My heart is growing like a weed!)
We were talking about all the struggles we’d had after childbirth (and when “Aunt Lucille” visits every month *wink*). From the often-overlooked emotionally-crippling postpartum anxiety to the frustrating existence of the postpartum pooch that stubbornly wants to stick around.
Honestly, that conversation was a breath of fresh air. We all bathed in the emotions of that simple reminder: we aren’t crazy!
As women, we were made with a super power. The power to understand the hidden emotional needs of our families.
How do we managed to pick up on these unspoken signals from our children and husbands? Hormones. The magic elixir that makes us so freaking amazing at bonding and tender loving care-ing.
Yes, hormones are awesome, but sometimes too much of a good thing can make us feel like Momzilla – ready to stomp the entire world into rubble just because we can.
It was so refreshing to hear these women share their own struggles with the hormonal rodeo and know that I’m not alone in this.
If you’ve been feeling a little alone in the craziness that is motherhood, let me assure you. You are not alone. Reach out with the rest of the Mighty Moms Club on Facebook or Instagram. Let us reassure you!
You are Changing the World
Have you ever heard of the butterfly effect?
It’s a theory that says that the smallest change in human history could drastically change the future.
- What if Paul Revere’s horse had thrown a shoe, and he never warned the Minutemen?
- What if the Titanic had missed that iceberg, and Rose and Jack spawned generations of French-painting artists?
- What if Hitler had had enough talent to stay in art school?
- What if JFK had chosen to ride in an closed car?
Little things can make a big impact on history. Little things like the 12-pound bundle cuddled in your arms.
The world is a different place, now that your baby has arrived. It will never be the same.
Your child is a significant part of the world.
The work he does…the relationships she fosters…all will change the course of history in some way. So don’t think for a minute that this time you’re spending, pouring into this loud messy little thing, is insignificant and wasted.
This mothering thing you’re doing?
It is holy work.
It is a work set apart from all other work.
The impact of this work will be felt hundreds of years into the future.
So take a deep breath. It’s time to dive back into the fray.
You got this.
Have You Read These Yet?
- You are a Mighty Mom. (Even if You Don’t Feel Like It.)
- Dear Homemaker: Use These 70 Life-Hacks to Steal More Time
- 3 Lies About Motherhood and the Truths That Will Set You Free
- 5 Quick Ways to Ease the Stress of Motherhood
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Heather is the Chief Encouragement Officer here at MightyMoms.club and has been writing and encouraging parents online since 2007. She’s a Certified Gentle Sleep Coach, has been a featured parenting expert writer on blogs like DaveRamsey.com, SimpleKids.net, Cafe Mom, and others. If it’s 2am and you’re desperate to read SOMETHING, check out her deepest darkest secrets, including why she really shouldn’t be allowed to blog.